An All-Star Karst

Haad Pak Meng

Sometimes I have to pinch myself to check if I’m actually still alive, and that I’m not in some kind of amazing dream that I’ll soon wake from, and then be plunged into another, far less glamorous, reality.

Not glamorous in the bourgie way of course, but in a natural, spectacular way.

Nope, I’m definitely here.

I can feel my own pinches.

I’m sitting on a plastic chair at a little wooden table, right on the beach, under some big old beach umbrellas, looking out over the most incredible vista of forest clad steep karst islands, and a hot shimmering ocean.

It’s about 4 o’clock in the afternoon, it’s Sunday, so all the Thai day-trippers or weekenders are either leaving, or have left already.

This place feels so incredibly sleepy.

It’s so relaxed that before you do anything you sorta think about it for a bit, take a couple of deep breaths, think about something else for awhile, and then maybe something else, and then eventually you remember what you thought you maybe felt like doing earlier, and then maybe you might actually move some part of your body towards potentially starting to do it.

Or you might not.

A couple of swimmers are slowly strolling into the liquid silver sea, their bodies eventually disappear, small black heads the only sign that they still exist.

A few Thai families sit around tables, like me, and eat, chat, and eat some more.

An old woman comes past selling spiced fried chicken pieces on sticks.

There’s a few old boats slowly skimming across the glassy sea, cutting across the sharp horizon, where the curved earth-ocean dips out of view, and meets the endless cloudless white sky.

This is the most beautiful beautiful Paradise.

I’ve been in Thailand for about 10 days now, and I really feel like I’ve settled in.

At first, the main thing I had to get my head around was the language, which is actually a really big thing when you’re travelling like I am, because I’m pretty much needing to speak the local lingo immediately, and then am speaking it all day, for days on end. I’ve hardly met any Thais that speak much English, so far, let alone tourists.

That will definitely change as I head north, and begin to hit part of the tourist trail around Krabi and Ao Nang.

Luckily I lived and worked in Thailand once, and could speak ok Thai, so it’s sort of all coming back to me - it’s more a matter of dredging through my long term memory banks, rather than learning it all from scratch.

But the language has changed, of course, as languages do, and there’s loads of new things to learn, and so much that I’ve temporarily forgotten.

Leaving Penang

After leaving Penang Island by ferry, and hitting the Malaysian mainland again, I turned left, and it took me about three days of riding north-ish to get up to the Thai border.

It was fun to be back on my loaded bike, after a couple of weeks of chilling in Penang, Ipoh and surrounds.

Beautiful heron flock in the ricefields

Pearl jam. In my straw, that is.

You wouldn’t believe how delicious this coconut drink was. When you’re riding, and you’re super hot, one of these goes down a perfect treat. Plus it had aniseed pearls in it, yum!, balls of flavoured tapioca. I didn’t expect that extra perfection.

Taking the palm oil backroads

More plastic banana leaf plates

Hawthorn juice is actually a super delicious drink, plus it reduces high blood pressure, apparently (which I don't have).

Tamil shrine and temple

After spending a night in Sungai Petani, I rode on towards Alor Setar, the capital of Kedah state, an important and powerful sultanate in Peninsular Malaysia’s northwest.

On the way a lovely bunch of local guys invited me to sit with them, and later paid for my breakfast and drinks. They were so sweet, all retired cops and army guys. People are just so amazing.

Everywhere.

The landscape changed as I headed north, more and more hills began to appear, a sign of things to come.

The shrooms are quite large around these parts

Another poor road victim.

Alor Setar is actually a beautiful city, with spacious gardens and plazas in its centre, and bustling markets.

There’s also big hawker food places to satisfy every culinary wish you care to imagine.

Well, not every culinary wish. For example, there’s no fresh German Brötchen (bread rolls) or Brezeln (freshly baked pretzel-shaped salty bread rolls). I do miss some things.

It may not look appealing, but it was absolutely delicious.

Masjid Zahir is really a super stunning mosque, and is lit beautifully at night

I got absolutely completely saturated riding back from town to my guest house at night, the rain was so torrential it made no difference that I had rain gear on. I’ve def had my fair share of rain dumps this trip.

The next couple of days I rode into blustery headwinds, so it was pretty slow going.

More karst as I ride north.

Amazing veg offerings from a small village. Unusual and tasty.

The Perlis Royal family

When I buy a shopping centre one day I’m gonna name it something like this

Or a shop with this name. Bagus means awesome.

Dinner time in Kangar, where I stayed the night.

More soy eggs

And then the next day I rode to the border. I was gonna stay the night on the Malaysian side, in Padang Besar, but there wasn’t really much there, and so I decided to cross the border and head further up. It turned out to be a massive day of riding.

“Berhenti, in the Name of Love.” Doesn’t quite have the same ring to it.

And finally the border. I was sad to leave Malaysia, and, of course, excited to hit Thailand at the exact same time.

Sawat Dii Khap!

Yay!!! Back to Thailand!

It’s so good to be back!

I spent a lot of time in this country in the 90s, and have been back regularly over the years, but not really to hang out that much - mainly as a stopover on my way to somewhere else.

And this time I’m likely to be here on and off for an extended period, throughout this year. In Penang I organised a Thai visa for 60 days (the longest I could get), which I can extend for another 30. So I don’t need to be in too much of a hurry.

I really love the laid-back Thai culture, the food is so amazing (fresh, varied and spicy), and parts of the country are just so wildly spectacular.

The first sign I saw when I crossed the border was this:

Last year cannabis was delisted as a narcotic in this country, meaning Thailand is the 7th country in the world to do so. Canada, Georgia (the country), Malta, Mexico, South Africa and Uruguay are the others, as well as 21 states in the US, and of course the ACT in Australia, (and various other jurisdictions).

In Thailand, people over 20 can smoke at home (as long as you’re not pregnant), or you can consume cannabis in food products at licensed cafes and restaurants. But if you smoke in public it’s a big fine, particularly around schools, temples and shopping malls.

It’s still legal to drive whilst stoned in Thailand, but that’ll probably change soon.  The death rate from road traffic accidents is already so high here, around 7.5 times higher than in Australia. It’s the number 1 cause of death here.

About 15% of road deaths in Thailand occur as a result of alcohol (the figure is 10% in Australia, and, interestingly, 18% in Queensland). Struth!

All those Banana Bender benders.

In my excitement to cross the border and ride off into the Thai sunset I totally forgot that I was in a new country, with a new currency, and a Malaysian SIM card that doesn’t work anymore. Oops.

I’m so blasé about these things sometimes.

So in the absence of any mapping (I’d also forgotten to download my maps.me map for southern Thailand, which works offline), I just headed up the main road, seeing a sign for Hat Yai, a city that I thought would be a good spot to stop for the night.

As it turns out, I was heading east instead of north.

Not to worry.

I eventually hit a town called Sadao, found an ATM, got some cash, found a phone shop, bought a new SIM card, and then at last I could eat, as I now had cash.

It’s so funny to be suddenly hurled into a new country with a new language, especially because I didn’t really think to prepare myself and look up some useful Thai phrases or anything before I got here, and it’s been ages since I spoke any Thai.

But of course it always works out. I had delicious food, realised I was heading in the wrong direction, and veered north to Hat Yai.

There were lots of rubber tree plantations on the way. Notice the half coconuts or plastic containers hanging from the trees. The bark is cut, which is known as “tapping” the tree, and a white milky sap slowly drips from the tree into the coconut shells. This sap is actually latex, and is processed into rubber.

The liquid is actually quite hard and rubbery if you touch it. Such a shock that’s it’s rubbery, given that it’s rubber.

Rubber is used for so many things, about 70% ends up in tyres, but they also make surgical gloves, mattresses, shoes, toys, balloons, machine seals, and, of course, rubbers (condoms) with it. And loads of other things. Thailand is the world’s largest supplier of natural rubber, producing about 37% of world supply.

Back to the Land of Wats (a wat is a Thai temple).

And back to Thai Royal family stuff everywhere. The guy on the left is the (relatively) new King of Thailand, King Maha Vajiralongkorn, and on the right, he’s with his wife, Queen Suthida.

I won’t make up any jokes about his name, or about absolutely anything else in relation to him or his Queen, because any criticism of the Royal family, even the most minor tiny little friendly dig, is a serious crime in Thailand, punishable by crazy long prison sentences.

The crime is called lèse majesté, and people are being prosecuted for it more frequently in recent years, rather than less.

Notable recent prosecutions include someone who criticised the Queen’s dress as “ugly,” an Aussie guy who mentioned that there was “romance and intrigue” associated with the royal family (in a book he’d written about his own travels), and, the best of the bunch, a BBC journalist, who put a picture of a Thai politician above a picture of the then King, on a BBC news webpage.

OMG, I just realised I've already put a picture of a dead mongoose up there. Shit!!

One Thai woman was recently sentenced to 87 years imprisonment for sharing numerous clips critical of the monarchy. The sentence was halved on appeal.

Oh, thats so great, now she only needs to spend 43.5 years in prison, she must be so happy.

When he was Crown Prince, the current king's pet miniature poodle, Foo Foo, was given the official rank of Air Force Marshall in the Thai Air Force.

That is actually true. He probably did a great job (Foo Foo, that is).

In 2007 the US Ambassador to Thailand held a gala dinner for 600 guests, and the Crown Prince was guest of honour. His "plus 1" somehow turned into a "plus 2," because Foo Foo came as well, dressed in formal evening attire, including paw mitts. Early in the evening Foo Foo jumped onto the main table, and starting drinking from the guests' water glasses, including the ambassador's.

The ambassador explained all this in a confidential cable to the US State Department, which Wikileaks got hold of.

You couldn't make this shit up.

I’m voting for the chick on the right, plus the dude in the middle, despite the fact that their electioneering language is all vacuous slogany nothingspeak.

There’s an election coming up in Thailand in May.

Elections have been rather rare occurrences in this country in the last few years, due to a military coup in 2014, which happened after the country was plagued by months of protests and demonstrations.

General Prayut took over as head honcho, and, after years of delay and excuses, elections were finally held in 2019. Guess who became PM after that? General Prayut! What a guy!

He’s still the PM, and is vying to stay in that position next time as well.

His main opponent is Paetongarn Shinawatra, daughter of previous billionaire PM Thaksin, who lives in self-imposed exile in London and Dubai.

Hat Yai

Hat Yai is a large city in the south of Thailand (population of about 400,000, including the ‘burbs), and, along with the nearby Songkhla, the whole conurbation is the most highly populated urban area in the south of the country.

When I first came here in the 90s much of the nightlife was geared towards catering for the needs of Malaysian men - girlie bars, cheap alcohol and overt prostitution. Posters of scantily clad women were plastered all over the walls of bars and clubs, with women outside enticing men like me to go in.

Did I go in?

Wouldn’t you like to know!

Nah I actually didn’t.

I saved that research for Bangkok.

Times have changed. These days most of the prostitution that used to be in Hat Yai has moved to a smaller town closer to the border, Dannok.

I mean, why drive 80km for cheap sex when you only need to drive 10?

Hatyai is full of Thai and Chinese tourists these days. Southern Thailand has the largest concentration of Chinese people outside of China, and many Chinese go to the city to visit relatives, or to enjoy Chinese and Thai culture at a bargain price.

The night markets are pumping, and there’s a lot of them.

Lee Gardens Night Market

Rather large and very rare albino Burmese python

Thailand’s got talent. No offence, but I would’ve gonged these guys. They were flat as a tack.

Ahhh, mango sticky rice with coconut milk. Again. This is sorta a bit of a lot of a staple for me these days.

I found a great little completely empty local vegan place near one of the wats. If you look around sometimes you can find these small vegan eating places, they’re normally open from about 6am to about 2 or 3pm (or when the food runs out), and are often near a wat. They often have a sign out the front like this:

This means jay, which denotes vegan food. All the food in these little places is vegan, and sometimes there’s a huge variety on offer, especially early in the morning (apparently). Sometimes it’s death spicy too.

One day I rode out to Wat Hatyai Nai, a beautiful temple.

Another beautiful reclining Buddha

While I was in the temple my darling Black Bewdy must’ve gone off collecting flowers for herself

Basket cases (among other beautiful things)

Thai TV often reminds me of its Australian counterpart. Not that I watch it much.

What??!! In the Name of Love.

You’d really wanna sort out your drainage

Greenways night market was incredible, one of the biggest and most delectable night markets I’ve ever seen

Chang beer. About $1.20 a can from the supermarket. No wonder people have so many hangovers in this country. I actually don’t like the taste of it much. I’d forgotten that.

One day I ventured off on my bike to the massive public park on the outskirts of the city. It’s beautiful, and so relaxed, with gorgeous lakes, steep hikes, temples and views. I went on a Sunday, the busiest day of the week, but it was still pretty chilled, even in the busiest areas.

Actual paved walk/cycleways. What a treat.

You like play woodball?

This steep steep road got my heart playing an intense drum solo. Luckily it wasn’t too arythmical. Cycle path to the left.

I eventually made it to the top of the hill, there was an elephant temple there, dedicated to Brahma.

This three-headed elephant was the biggest of a whole herd

They really were everywhere

Many locals came up to the temple while I was there, carrying large boxes of fireworks. There was a big bunker there, and an official fireworks dude, who set them up for each group. It was amazing, and of course crazy loud.

Good idea

The fireworks were in massive rolls that the dude unfurled, and hung from one end. Then a person from the group would light the fuse, and then everyone would scatter. Except the fireworks dude.

Right at the end of all the blasts of one of these long strings of fireworks, just when you think it’s all over, there’d be a pause, and then a really loud loud blast would go off, like a bomb. Then, after another couple of seconds, there’d be another, even louder, one.

The fireworks dude never blocked his ears. He probs doesn’t have any eardrums anymore.

It’d actually be a perfect job for a deaf pyromaniac.

Lucky last blast. Aren’t you amazed at my incredible photographic reaction time?

Oh yeah, there was a gorgeous view from the top too

Songkhla

After a couple of days in Hatyai I took the back roads and headed to the east coast.

These birds are called Asian openbills, and are actually quite large. They’re really beautiful waterbirds, I’ve seen quite a lot of them lately.

Btw I really apologise for the bad photos I post sometimes. One of these days I’ll upgrade my phone (when it dies). I tend to err on the side of posting them anyway. Unfortunately the pic quality also declines markedly when I upload them. Despite that the photos still take forever to upload around here.

Also, I keep forgetting to tell you that occasionally the shots I post are taken by people I’ve been travelling with. But almost all of the pics are mine. Not that it really matters, at least not to me.

Way back in another life, in some of my earlier posts, a lot of those amazing Oz hiking shots were Miranda’s or Iain’s or Michael’s.

Just saying.

Buffali. Oh ok, buffaloes then.

And then, for the first time on this trip (and hopefully not the last), I could finally cast my eyes out over the Gulf of Thailand, looking out from the east coast. It’s sort of another milestone, to get all the way to here, from Bali.

If I swam out from the coast here, right across the gulf, I’d end up at the southernmost tip of Vietnam.

There’s a beautiful strip of beach that runs along the eastern side of this town of Songkhla, and a massive inlet and lake system along the western edge.

Yeah, that’s a horse. Her owner was nowhere to be seen.

Let sleeping dogs lie (very important with packs of dogs). Luckily my bike is quiet. But actually dogs haven’t really been a problem in Thailand at all, there’s the occasional chase, but nothing too bad. Night time can be an issue though, in some places.

One day I rode partly around the lake inlet to the west, and across a bridge to an island, Ko Yo.

Hey, they could use that name for coconut yoghurt.

There was a wat right on the lakeside on the island, which was obviously a very sleepy place, as even Buddha was having a kip.

I rode through a small fishing village.

Really cool spirit house.

Spirit houses are really common in Thailand, as they are in all countries in Southeast Asia. They’re normally built when someone clears some land, or builds a house, and their purpose is to house the earth spirits, who have been displaced by the disruption.

Offerings of food and drink are left for the spirits, commonly red soft drinks, lids off for convenience. The red colour signifies blood, which is associated with sacrifice, and fertility.

The guy on the throne on the right is King Chukalongkorn, or King Rama V, a beloved Thai king who was around in the late 1800s and early 1900s. Don’t ask me who Baby Doll is, but I really love him, he’s the dude.

Not nice to see this on the road. It’s the remains of a motorbike helmet.

The other bit was about 20m away. Eek. Hopefully just a rogue helmet that fell off a bike or something. Yeah, must be. No blood stains.

Songkhla township is a pretty sleepy relaxed place, once you get off the main roads, and, particularly, when you get into the old town.

Old city wall

The town was once the capital of a sultanate called Singora, it looked pretty different in those days.

Then

And now

Old warehouse by the pier

The blues

Filipino jeepneys. These are a really common form of transport in the Philippines, don’t ask me what the hell these two are doing here in Songkhla, because you never ever see them in Thailand.

Thai people use sawngthaews instead, which are utes converted into a little transport vehicle. The name sawngthaew means 2 rows, as they each have 2 rows of seats. But they’re nowhere near as flashy as the jeepneys.

Hotel room warning

The night markets were awesome in Songkhla too. We went every night.

Seafood everywhere

Coconut rice in palm leaves, cooked over coals. These were a little too well done for my tastes. Tasty, but too hard.

In Hatyai I met a really nice English guy from near Glastonbury, Craig, and we arranged to meet up again in Songkhla. Wow! I could speak English for a change, intact English even, it didn’t need to be broken.

Craig comes to Thailand frequently, and knows the place well. We met up for dinner or brekky and hung out at nights, it was really fun. We did our own thing during the day, which suited both of us, as we ride different species of bike (he has a motorbike).

We chatted about lots of things, he has a 12 year old daughter, he’s sort of a hippy, and spends lots of time travelling, away from England. Sometimes with his daughter, sometimes alone. We connected on lots of levels.

There were monkeys galore around the forested hill right in the middle of town.

Craig is a durian freak, he loves them with a passion. He bought a nice one from this guy.

Beautiful colours, sad idea.

Up The East Coast

So after a few days I rode on to a little ferry, crossed the river/inlet, and headed north.

There were lots of temples on the way, some with little cemeteries within the grounds.

As Thailand is a Buddhist country, most dead bodies are cremated, and normally the ashes are scattered in a river or somewhere in nature. Sometimes they’re placed inside temple walls with a little plaque, or inside a chedi.

But occasionally the dead are buried or cremated, and shrines placed over their remains.

Temple guardians, known as yaks, are common outside wats in Thailand.

This woman was selling the most delicious honey, and nectar drinks, on the side of the road. I bought a bottle of a homemade flower nectar drink, it was absolutely delicious.

It pretty much rained all day. I kept riding, looking for a spot to stay, but there was nothing at all around. Eventually it was getting dark, and there was only one place that had a room. Unfortunately for me I had to put up with a luxury hotel with a gym and a pool, which also happened to be relatively cheap. Poor me.

I mean, not cheap compared to other hotels around here, it was about $30/night, but you know what I mean.

The water in the pool is churned up because I just got out of there.

Steel drum

My rain pants kept rubbing against my leg all day and caused a rash. It looks worse than it was. Nothing that a bit of coconut oil won’t heal.

Thale Luang and Thale Noi

The next day was one of the most unusually scenic days of my whole trip, and I hadn’t expected it.

In fact, to be honest, it’s not a surprise that I didn’t expect it, because I never really check out the scenery on the roads I’m gonna travel on, I much prefer to just see it when I’m there.

I do check out the gradients sometimes though, I sorta need to, when deciding which roads to take.

Most of the day I either rode around, or rode over, amazing lakes and river systems, which were incredibly beautiful.

Thale Luang means “royal sea,” thale noi means “small sea.”

Everything was flooded, the lakes were full. There’s been loads of rain.

Many parts of Songkhla Province, particularly in the north, are quite stunning. Massive lake systems and relatively low human populations in the north provide a haven for wildlife and aquatic plants, especially for waterbirds.

The Thale Noi area is a Ramsar wetlands site, Thailand’s first. Ramsar is an international body that recognises wetland areas of international significance.

Lookin very lush

Dead Slytherins

Drying lake produce

Designated cycle path (and never-used, except by me)

This elevated roadway went on forever

Bird hide

Good quality paved empty roads

Elaborate fish trap. Made almost completely from collected wood

Lots of them. Now we know where all that dried fish comes from

Hitting the bumpy gravel

A famous person adorning the lake edge. Looks to me like Rama V again.

There’s dugongs in them there waters. Apparently.

Incredible how similar these figures are to Balinese statues.

Phattalung

On the quiet wide road into town

Switchboard at my old-school hotel

And this was in my room. It didn’t work. I tried it. I actually did. You never know.

I loved my hotel, the Hotel Ho Fah, a really old Chinese one, with a lovely old owner who could speak just a spattering of English.

I love Phattalung!

It’s one of my favourite towns in Thailand right now. It’s small but not too small, absolutely old style Thai, no big developments whatsoever, no tourists, great night markets, and super super friendly locals who also can’t speak a word of English.

This really feels like Thailand as it was 30 years ago.

This isn’t what you think it is. It’s actually the most delicious tea, from a vegan eating place. I wish I’d asked what it was, I loved it! (I’m gonna try and find out).

Trang

I decided to head west again, to check out some of the magnificent karst limestone cliffs on the west coast, the Andaman Coast. Thailand’s pretty skinny down there, it’s only about 160km from the east coast to the west.

I had to cross a range of hills to get there. Not long out of Phattalung the road started to climb, and it was up and down for awhile. The scenery was really magnificent, the roads weren’t too steep (but steep enough).

Trang is an old rubber town, it’s bigger than Phattalung, and it doesn’t have the same small town vibe.

It’s still super interesting though, with an amazing wet market, and gorgeous night market for food and clothes etc.

This intersection, where the clock tower is, is called Time Square. No joke. Zoom in on the blue sign, centre left, if you need proof.

Actually, I’ve seen a few Times Squares in Asia. There’s one in Georgetown, one in Bangkok, and another in Hong Kong. I’m sure there’s more. None are even a patch on the real McCoy.

But this is the first Time Square I’ve ever visited, and I’m so proud of the naming of it, given the clock tower and all.

Buying and displaying gold jewellery is huge in Asia, particularly by Chinese people and Indians. But so many Southeast Asians of all persuasions seem to be into gold, and jewellery shops are everywhere.

Dry wet market

Tiaras, coronas and crowns, for little princesses and princes

I love these school buses

I’ll have to ask someone what this poster says.

Ok I did. It says “mushroom house.” I was hoping for something more psychedelically cryptic. But no one knows what it’s actually advertising, so I guess that’s cryptic.

Sidesaddler

Wet wet market

Just imagine all the mouths this stuff is gonna burn

So many dried mushrooms. Perfect hiking food.

I found a stall selling the best papaya in the known world. I had to go there a few times. It was more perfect than perfect has ever even tried to hint at.

This lovely couple had driven their shiny frog-face tuk-tuk all the way from Songkhla, to get it registered in Trang. They were so sweet.

A beautiful chedi, on the road heading out of town. A chedi is a Thai word for stupa, which is one of these things.

Ok, sorry for being a smartAlex, I’ll tell you then.

A chedi is one of the most important features in a Thai temple, and sometimes contains relics of an important Buddhist saint, a holy person, or even, in the case of very important temples, relics of the head honcho Buddha himself.

Relics often include cremation ashes, teeth, hair, or even fingernails. Not sure about old toenails, but probably. They’re really important in old school Buddhist tradition. Relics that is, not toenails.

Footprints of the Buddha or his disciples are pretty hip too. In the past temples were only able to be set up if they already actually had relics of some description.

But these days that tradition is a bit of a relic, and monasteries and temples seem to be popping up everywhere anyway.

The Andaman Coast

And so, westward I rode, passing through this horny Andaman Gate.

Cute waterfall.

More rubberwood trees.

On the road to Pak Meng beach.

I so wanted to stop here, the dugong out the front was so welcoming, basically one of the friendliest dugongs I’ve ever met, but unfortunately there were no humans there, and the dugong said he wasn’t that great a cook.

Black Bewdy before she freshened up and slipped into something more comfortable

Stunning sunset tonight.

There were cute little nightmarkets down the road. Basically all local yokels.

See the full moon?

Haven’t had a brekky like this since Bali. It wasn’t my fave. The bread is always too sweet around here, at least, for me. As is the margarine (or whatever it is). Anyway normal Thai breakfasts are my preference these days, all savoury and spicy.

Heading To Disneyland

It took me a couple of days to ride to Krabi, a town that sits beautifully alongside a mangrovey tidal river that pushes inland from the coast.

The first day was sometimes disgustingly stinky. Not because of the heat (even though it was stinky hot), but because of the smelly palm oil factories.

Loads of pickups full of palm oil fruits passed me on the road, as well as old trucks packed to the rafters with the stuff.

Processing factories were dotted along the road.

These tankers transport liquid palm oil, not petrol.

The reason the factories smell so putrid is because ammonia and hydrogen sulphide gases are released during the effluent treatment process. I seriously feel sorry for all the people living in the villages nearby. The companies should have to capture those gases. In my view the fact that they get away with producing that sort of smelly air pollution really stinks.

I stayed in a cute little one horse town called Khlong Thom for the night. There was really just the main road, and then tiny little streets like this one, where my guest house was. Can you see the full moon?

It’s here too.

The building on the right with the cool roof is a Muslim night market.

My spot for dinner

Year of the Rabbit

Of course, roti kai kluay has become another of my staples, as it’s so yummy. Banana and egg. Yummm.

It really is the best. Note the sweetened condensed milk.

Some banana varieties have seeds in them. It’s dodgy. I sorta knew that, but forgot, and nearly broke a tooth on this one. The seeds are black and round, and don’t appear in all the bananas in a bunch, just some. It’s random.

I know what the seeded banana varieties look like, so hopefully I’ll try to remember not to buy them anymore.

My guitar really doesn’t feel the heat. How she survives with this on is beyond me. The hat is sweet, and is super bright for the traffic though, when she’s on the back of my Bewdy.

Hmmm. I’ve noticed that I’m so lonely that I’m starting to have quite complex attached relationships with my guitar and my bicycle. I guess I’d better go and find some English speaking humans to talk to soon, before I forget how to do it.

That won’t be too hard around these parts. For the first time since I’ve been in Thailand, there’s loads of Caucasian tourists around here, the farang have well and truly found this place.

Farang is a Thai word for foreigner, or, more accurately, Westerner, and it also means guava. It’s used a lot by Thai people, and, while some Western expats don’t like the word, it really isn’t derogatory, it’s normally simply used as a descriptor.

Krabi

So I’ve finally hit the tourist trail. It’s a serious shock, on two counts.

Firstly, it’s so weird to see so many Westerners all of a sudden. I’ve hardly seen any since Penang, a few weeks back, and before that, way back in the south of Bali.

Last night I was in small town Thailand, and suddenly I’m in Touristville. There’s Westerners to actually talk with, they’re even staying in my grungy little guest house.

Secondly, many Thai people in the food places, hotels and shops here can speak basic English. Food and drink stalls, shops etc have many signs in English. Wow! Not that I really need it anymore, but it’s a bit easier.

I really like Krabi. Even though there’s a lot of farang in certain parts of the town, the beautiful river and surrounding parks gives the place a peaceful, relaxed vibe. People are friendly. The wet market, Maharaj market, and the various night markets are really good. There’s heaps of great food everywhere.

Riverside at dusk

Flouting restaurant. Flouting by not floating.

Beautiful full moon rise

The amazing night markets, so much food on offer, it’s so hard to choose.

Ginormous pomelos

Avos, Thai style

I’ve had chicken feet before. They’re the most tasteless gristly unappetising food of all time. Well the ones I had were. But people eat them, so, hey, what do I know?

Weed shops are everywhere

Commuters with their motorbikes on a long-tailed boat

Krabi burbs

Sharp wit

Neanderthal traffic lights

More elephants

The white ordination hall at Wat Kaew Korawararam in town. It’s unusual to have white temples in Thailand, there’s only a few, scattered about, the most famous is Wat Rong Khun near Chiang Rai.

Just in case you were wondering.

This reminds me of Byron’s now-removed much-maligned roundabout penis sculpture - like this, it was in the wrong place at the wrong time.

Shrine in my hotel

I finally got around to trying to wash the stains out of my clothes.

Before

After. I forgot to photograph the blackened sink before I scrubbed it. I haven’t done this riding shirt yet, just in case you were wondering.

Ao Nang

And I thought Krabi was bad. Tourist-wise.

Ao Nang is absolutely nuts. Seriously.

The totally packed beach and main drag are so full of Westerners that it’s pretty much unrecognisable as part of Thailand.

Except for the over-touristed parts of Thailand that is.

As I strolled through the crowds, checking out the latest beachwear fashion and hair sculptures, it was a surprise to me that the main language I was eavesdropping on wasn’t English. It was overwhelmingly Russian, then Dutch, then German.

According to my rigorous scientific peer-reviewed research anyway.

Native English is only to be heard occasionally around here, although of course it’s the transactional language, and is the language that tourists of different nationalities use to communicate with each other.

European travel restrictions for Russian citizens since the Ukraine war have resulted in an explosion of Russians in Thailand. Direct flights from Russia to main cities in this part of Thailand (Phuket and Krabi) and Pattaya are now frequent, and full.

Wealthy Russian men attempting to avoid conscription have been buying up property in Thailand through agents. A whopping 233,000 Russians arrived in Phuket in the last two months alone, from Dec 2022 to Jan this year, for both short and long term stays. Tourist providers estimate 95% of farang in Pattaya are Russian.

So here in Ao Nang, souvenir and clothes shops completely dominate the main street, which seems to go on forever, there’s a million places to eat, a billion bars, a zillion hotels, a quadrillion tour touts left right and centre, and hawker stalls every one step.

This place is really not my scene, by a long shot. I’m sure that doesn’t surprise you. But it’s sorta fun too, in small doses. Especially the people watching. It’s super interesting, for a while.

The beaches, however, are completely another story. I can spend a long time on those. They’re magnificent. Incredible natural karst formations dominate the ocean vistas, the beaches are long and sweeping, the water feels like warm liquid silver on the skin. It’s pure bliss.

And all you need to do is head 10 minutes down the road on a bicycle, go for a five minute stroll, and there’s hardly any people on the beach at all. Including Thais. I find it so unbelievable.

There seems to be no doubt whatsoever in my mind that we definitely are a herding species.

The road between Krabi and Ao Nang has loads of beautiful karst cliffs alongside it.

Karst is a type of topographic landscape that has resulted from the long term dissolving of limestone, gypsum or dolomite rock by water, which is slightly acidified by the terrain it passes through. The rock tends to be soft and porous.

The Nullarbor region in Australia, for example, is the world’s largest karst formation, but because it’s so dry, there’s little evidence of erosion above ground.

Around here, on the other hand, in Krabi province, like in many places in Thailand, there’s mature karst formations, where the limestone has already been eroded by lots of water over millions of years, and what’s left standing is just the un-eroded bits.

Because of the type of rock, this makes the surrounding countryside absolutely stunning.

The beautiful, albeit crowded, beach at Ao Nang

Russian, but not rushin’

Koh Phi Phi and surrounding islands in the distance, famous for their iconic beaches, which have appeared in countless movies with Hollywood megagods such as Leo Di Capprio and Roger Moore. As a result, it’s pretty busy out there with day trippers, but you can still find quiet spots (apparently).

The beach here wasn’t nice to hang out on, due to the constant loud heavy putting of all the tourist boat traffic.

Tour posters

AUD8 for a one hour massage

Countless beachside bars and ritzy restaurants

Instead, I went up the road and around the corner to Haad Napparat Thara. There was basically no one there.

The track to my own private beach

I hung out here a lot

I found a bamboo hut on a little organic farm in the bush, about 5km from the craziness.

There were 3 huts alongside each other, with Derek, a long time English traveller in one, and a young Polish couple, Tomek and Marta, in the one next to mine. We had lots of chats and fruit munching sessions, and each night we cleverly solved all the problems of the world, one by one.

The view around the corner of the huts

Public sculpture is big around here

They re-paved the road for me, Thai people are so hospitable

Haad Ao Nam Mao and Susaan Hoi

One fine hot day (they’ve all been fine and hot lately), I rode around to some quieter coastal spots where no one much goes.

There’s quite a lot of mosques around here. Half of the population of Krabi Province is Muslim. So there’s lots of delicious halal Muslim food to be had too.

A local Buddhist guy, Pae, who runs one of the local bike shops, told me today that he can’t really do anything much during the month of Ramadan (Mar 22 till April 20 this year), such as any partying or going on holidays, because it’ll be seriously frowned upon by his Muslim friends, neighbours and customers.

I asked him if that extended to not eating during daylight hours, as Muslims do during that time. He said definitely not, because of his unbreakable habit of eating pretty much all day every day. He has such a great sense of humour.

Being in a larger town, I’ve taken the opportunity to have a bit of bike servicing done. Besides giving the chain and cassette a major clean, I also asked Pae to exchange the front and back tyres with each other, as the back one is looking pretty worse-for-wear.

It’s amazing really. I got new tyres before I left Oz, and now, a little more than 3 months later, and one of them is already looking decidedly old.

I haven’t been keeping tabs on how many kilometres I’ve cycled, I do have a little digital speed and distance reader thingy, but I never bother putting it on, it doesn’t really interest me too much. But I’ve ridden at least a couple of thousand clicks so far, and, with all that load on my back tyre, no wonder it’s looking ratty.

Sleepy mangrovey coast

This is not a concrete carpark that’s been eroded by the sea. This coastline around Susaan Hoi (branded Shell Beach for tourists), even though it looks a little uninspiring, actually contains significant deposits of millions-of-years-old shell fossils.

Some of the fossils were really quite large

Native rainforest fruit tree. No one seems to know exactly what it is, including me.

Donald, Melania, Ivanka and Jared blimps. Aka durian fish

Should be left on the beach if you ask me. Note the “real pearl 100%” bracelets for $7.

One of the better named cannabis shops back in town

Doin the business

I got my hopes up for about 5 seconds. Europe is more likely double this distance for me, due to my probable very wobbly route. I definitely don’t intend to fly as the crow.

Utes blasting out loud ads for Muay Thai (kickboxing). They regularly plough the busy main street of Ao Nang, disturbing the noise.

Every day is Christmas

Looks wonky, but it’s actually flat. It keeps tricking me.

Massage, beer, cannabis, sweets, other tourists. What else could you need? This place in a nutshell.

Oh yeah, and European football.

Anti-drugs election candidate. Zero tolerance.

I forgot, there’s actually a world going on outside this tourist bubble.

Wat Tham Suea (Tiger Cave Temple)

One day I rode out to this amazing temple, out of town. I didn’t really know much about it, except that I’d seen it in the distance a couple of times, and knew that I had to go up there.

See that stupa right on top of the pointy hill? That’s where I’m headed.

This is another Thai/Chinese temple, and the statue is another of Guan Yin.

The temple is named Tiger Cave Temple because, according to monks who used to meditate in the caves here, tigers used to roam around in the forest and near the caves. That’d definitely test your equanimity whilst meditating.

Maybe the tigers weren’t too interested in the monks though, as they were all skinny and hardly ever ate.

Cliffs and caves at the bottom.

Tree roots

There’s a lot of temple buildings and statues at the bottom of the hill, but there’s also a super steep concrete staircase leading to the top.

There’s 1260 stairs leading to the summit, a climb of over 300m, virtually straight up. Some of the steps were more than 30cm high. It was a tough climb, and a tough descent.

But it was worth it. The views were amazing.

Up I go.

The dharmachakra, or wheel of dharma, is an ancient Hindu, Jain and especially Buddhist religious symbol. In Buddhism, it represents the Buddha’s teachings and the universal moral order (the dharma).

Exquisite

Buddha’s footprint. He must’ve been big.

Magnificent views

A karst of hundreds

The hazy view to the sea

Silence Beckons

You’ve probably noticed I haven’t actually been posting blogs quite so regularly lately.

I really love writing and sharing pics with you guys, but lately I’ve been so busy doing nothing that I’ve hardly found the time.

Plus there’s so many interesting things to actually do, besides doing nothing. There's people to meet, places to visit, foodstuffs to dribble over and then put in my mouth.

Looking ahead, my little plan is to keep heading up the beautiful southwest coast for awhile, and then eventually to cross back over to the east, to eventually get to Surat Thani.

At the end of this month of March, I’m planning to go to a Thai monastery, Wat Suan Mokkh, to do a 10 day Vipassana meditation retreat.

I’ll be in silence for the whole time, no phone, books or other devices to escape into.

No, I’ll just be left to my own devices.

I’ve done retreats at the monastery before, but the last one was over 15 years ago. The beautiful monks there are dear to my heart.

They were the ones who first introduced me to meditation, and to a completely different way of experiencing and understanding life.

Lucky lucky me.

I so look forward to chatting to you guys on the flip side. I imagine things will feel pretty different.❤️