Dost To Dost

Parts 1 to 3

I haven't sat down to write forever.

Having Frankie, Phil and Ajuna here full time has put an end to all that.

The glorious bastards.

Right now I'm stretched out on my sleeper bed on yet another train, this time from Varanasi to Khajuraho. It's 9.30pm, Phil's lying down across the compartment from me, reading, and all the other bench beds around me are occupied by locals.

Frankie and Ajuna are gone already. They left this morning, before us. It's so sad. They're now in Delhi, both flying out over the next couple of days - Frankie back to Oz, and Ajuna to Sri Lanka, to work and carry on with her studies, online this time.

We've had the most amazing trip together, and Phil and I are still together for another week or so, we wanna explore some new parts of northern India, places that neither of us have ever been.

Back to Varkala

It seems like forever since they all arrived.

The morning after Frankie landed in Trivandrum, and while Ajuna slept, him and I went out for a traditional Keralan breakfast of putthu, a dish of steamed rice and coconut, served with coconut sambhar and curry.

Frankie feasting

They mix fermented rice with fresh desiccated coconut, then steam it in these cylindrical capsules. Sometimes they put dried fruit and nuts in there too - that's my fave.

Oh to be Wanted.

And then it was off to the airport for the third time in 2 days, to collect Phil. It was so amazing to see him again after all this time, and, yeah, it felt completely normal, like we hadn't seen each other for a couple of days or so.

So that my Ozish friends could ease into their Indian adventures a bit, I booked a house for us in Varkala, a beachside town about an hour north of the Keralan capital of Trivandrum. I visited the place a few days before to sort it all out.

It was a big house, about a 10 minute walk from a beautiful beach, and about the same distance from the small temple area that has a regular flow of Indian pilgrims.

Us and the pad.

I had a room out the back. It was plastered with psychedelic paintings, don't ask me how they knew about my brain in advance.

We frequented 2 beaches - the main beach at Varkala, and another much nicer and quieter one furthe south.

Varkala beach, from the cliffs.

Hangin' out on the main beach. Not a bikini in sight. Nor any kind of female bathing suit whatsoever, pretty much. The women were literally swimming in their sarees, and actually even some of the men were going in fully clothed, in their long shirts and long pants. St Tropez it definitely is not.

It was amazing to see these guys again. It feels like I saw them all just last week, but actually the last time was late in 2022. There's no distance whatsoever in good friendships is there.

We spent the next few days catching up, hangin' out, going out for food and drinks, chillin' on the beach, going for walks, visiting temples and other beaches, and exploring the larger town of Varkala, which is a couple of clicks up the road.

And of course, talking about all sorts of things, the whole time. When you haven't seen each for that long, and despite the fact that we occasionally chat on WhatsApp, there was always heaps and heaps to say. And to listen to.

South Indian diner. Amazingly good food. And cheap.

First brekky, at a little home up the road that offers food. The little pancakes are called appam, soft fermented rice pancakes you dip in delicious curry and coconut sambar.

Frankie fruit shopping

The larger town of Varkala

Inspires so much confidence

Local minibus

The beach below Cafe Sarwa, a much quieter beach south of the main beach, where everyone could get their kit off. Well, not all of it.

The Dodgy Brothers

Dad and Daughter. These guys hadn't seen each other for six months.

Ebony and Ivory

In step

Larger-than-life Kollywood superhero Vijay Talapathy. Kollywood is the massive Tamil film industry, the K comes from the Kodambakkan district of Chennai. Tamil films are hugely popular in Kerala, even though Keralans have their own film industry, in the Malayalam language, called, believe it or not, Mollywood.

Beautiful mosque. One great thing about Kerala, and about South India in general, is its religious tolerance. Hindus, Muslims and Christians live side by side, respect each other's belief systems, and even sometimes partake in each other's religious festivals.

Unfortunately in northern India it's not the same anymore. What used to be a relatively harmonious pluralist society, (besides a few notable exceptions), is now being hijacked by the ultra nationalist BJP political party, Modi's ruling national party, which has actively encouraged religious discrimination, particularly against Muslims, and has funded huge temple projects glorifying Hinduism and Hindu-nationalism, and neglecting to fund non-Hindu religious and social welfare projects.

Shiva and Shakti gettin' down

This guy was singing pretty good versions of some classical Brazilian bossa songs.

Don't ask

Real coffee. Keralan coffee is actually super delicious, when you can get it.

We did some pujas at the local temples. It was beautiful. The main temple is incredibly old, with rows of amazing stone sculptures of deities all over the place. No pics allowed though. Well, not inside the main part anyway.

The temple kund, where worshippers ritually bathe to purify themselves.

Sucking on a banana, as I prepare for the trauma of losing my long wispy locks to Frankie's unpredictable hair cutting scissors.

Even though I'd been feverish, snotty and weak for a few days before the crew arrived, I gradually recovered over those few days, after lots of resting, and after taking a course of lotions and potions from an Ayurvedic doctor in Trivandrum.

But the best balm, of course, was having those beautiful people around me.

Kollam

After a few days we headed to Kollam, a larger town about an hour north up the coast.

Keralan coastal snaps from the road.

We stayed right on the Ashtamudi Lake, a couple of clicks out of Kollam town, in a beautiful spot. The four of us shared a room. And we all survived.

Our spot right on the lake. A few other travellers were staying there too.

Seriously being Frankie

Eventually we strolled and bussed it into town.

Catholic Church with golden flagpole. The golden pole idea has been stolen from Hindu temples, we saw a bunch of them in other places in Kerala and Tamil Nadu.

Crossing the lake

Licit contraband

This guy was a banana dosa. Don't try one, at least not from this place. It was spicy and savoury, and the semi-sweetness of the banana definitely didn't ding any of our bells. Only two of us finished what we'd started.

The Communist Party of India (Marxist). On a state government level, southern India has either been ruled by, or influenced by, this political party for decades. They're the biggest party in the currently ruling left wing coalition in Kerala.

It's not a coincidence that social welfare, health, literacy and other social indicators are consistently higher in Kerala than in other parts of India.

We nearly went to the Donalduck restaurant, but got distracted by some other Mickeymouse wannabe.

Dyed chicks before they're died

The underwhelming city beach at Kollam

You don't see many naked boobs in conservative India, especially on modern statues.

Be careful

Street tatooist

The best staircase ever. It's been made to look exactly like an escalator, with the glass and the railings, but it ain't an escalator, just a plain old staircase.

Local old-school picture theatre. There was nothing on with English subtitles.

The smoothies weren't very berry good. All the different flavours we ordered tasted pretty much exactly the same. Sad but true.

India's full of posters like this, they're everywhere

I had a falooda, which is a fruit/yoghurt/milkshake thing, with various additives like rice noodles and tapioca balls. It would've been even more delicious if it weren't for the three kilos of sugar.

Not exactly sure how much vigilance is going on. Corruption is still a huge problem in India.

The Backwaters

After a really fun night of exploring the local streets (and the street food of course), we headed back to town the next day, so we could grab a bus further north.

Luckily we hitched a lift on this houseboat, which was stocking up on water at our guesthouse.

Frankie and Phil said they went to some great early morning pujas at some local temples, but I didn't believe them. Looks more like Frankie slipped into some cowshit, which isn't hard to do in these parts, given that it's basically everywhere.

The quadruplets, warmed under the Sacred Heart of Jesus

On yet another squeeze bus.

More coastal Kerala

The southern Indian state of Kerala is known for its laid back vibe, its beaches, and for its backwaters. The backwaters are large tracts of waterways spreading inland and roughly running parallel to the coast, where villagers have lived for centuries, getting around on small wooden boats.

Unfortunately, these days some parts of the waterways have become tourist meccas, where the thing to do for wealthy Indians (and some foreigners) is to pay exorbitant amounts of money to zip around on big houseboats. Hundreds of them ply through the larger waterways, making the whole place feel more like a busy harbour than a tranquil backwater.

To avoid these shenanigans, we decided to rent a much smaller boat and skipper, and go cruising around ourselves.

Peace and love man. Fingers, legs and feet.

Crawling through the plant-topped small canals out of Alleppey township.

One of the hundreds of houseboat behemoths we saw on our trip. Well, they're actually quite beautiful, it's just that there's way too many of them

We stopped at a local eating place for a stunningly good banana leaf thali.

Before

After

After after

After after after

Houseboat circus

It was beautiful cruising through the quieter smaller canals as dusk came on, waterways that the larger houseboats can't manoeuvre through.

Churchpole

Water village. Boat access only.

Eventually we made it back to Alleppey, and took a taxi to our beachside homestay at Marari Beach, about 10 clicks up the road.

Actual backpacking

Stocking up on fruit and chocolate

Our guest house entrance wall. This an image of a kathakali dancer, a traditional Keralalan dance form characterised by incredible eye and facial movements, as well as elaborate costumes and face makeup that often looks just like this.

Once Upon A Time In India

Phil, Frankie and I go back a long long way, to another lifetime.

Phil and I met in a Vipassana meditation centre in Dharamsala, Himachal Pradesh, in 1997, when I moved into his canvas dorm tent, and we spent the next little while either sitting as students, or serving, at a bunch of 10-day silent meditation retreats.

Phil had been living at the meditation centre for a couple of years before me, he was already an experienced meditator. I'd already done a few retreats in various places, but was much greener, when it comes to that particular spiritual pathway.

We connected immediately, over many long and deep conversations, and over many amazing jams at some place or other. There was a whole bunch of us there at that time, from all over the world, we were all so blissfully open to connecting with each other, and to experiencing everything India had to offer, being completely intoxicated by the place, in more ways than one.

But actually, at that time, as Vipassana students, we were all living quite the purist lives, without any material intoxicants whatsoever, just getting high on each other, new experiences, and the many inspiring ideas that our teachers and our own minds were delivering to us regularly.

Phil, Hope and I with some of the other crew in the Vipassana centre kitchen in 1997.

When Phil and I parted ways he stayed in India, and I visited him again a few months later in Mussoorie, where he was studying Sanskrit and Hindi.

We kept in touch over the years, and he eventually moved to Oz, and bought land in the same community I was living in. At my urging. We've been friends the whole time.

Phil's spent most of his adult life learning and teaching eastern philiosophies, particularly yoga and Indian spiritual belief systems, but also Chinese medicine and Japanese shiatsu. He also teaches mindfulness, meditation and dance, and spends his days gallivanting around the planet running courses and workshops, and earning good money doing it. He also regularly attends courses himself, as a student.

But way more importantly, Phil is one of the most loyal, generous, intelligent, honest, driven, and resourceful people I know. It's so great to be back here in India with him, the place where our long friendship first blossomed.

By no small coincidence, I also met Frankie at the very same Vipassana centre, about a year later. Frankie was totally in love with one of the meditation students, a Brazilian woman called Elizabeth. I can just imagine what his meditation was like during the 10 day silent course.

Frankie courted her throughout the silent course by illegally passing her secret notes, and eventually snagged his target. Beth and him eventually also ended up migrating to Australia, Frankie was sponsored by a hairdressing company, and they had their daughter Ajuna a short time after Carmen and I had Manu.

Although Frankie Beth and Ajuna lived in Sydney and then in Blackheath in the Blue Mountains, and I lived in Mullumbimby, we saw each other every now and again, and he eventually moved up to the north coast about 10 years ago.

We've been close friends forever, but especially since he moved near me. We'd actually be married by now if it wasn't for the fact that his vaginal passage and ovaries are inside out, and his man-boobs are a little too big for my particular preference.

Frankie is one of the most amazing people I know. He's warm, generous, hilariously funny, he's into absolutely everything, is always ready to party, and is one of the most friendly, un-self conscious and open people I know. It's an absolute pleasure watching him relate to people here in India. He's also pretty deep and spiritual, and into love and peace, man.

So here we are, the Three Dost, three India friends, now beautifully embellished by Frankie's amazing daughter Ajuna, who's 24, and who I've also spent quite a lot of time with, especially over the past few years. She made the potentially fraught decision to come here to India for her very first time with her dad and two of his mates, and while that could theoretically be the recipe for a rapid death-by-boredom, she actually told us the other day that she's had loads of fun.

She could be a really good liar. Or it could be true, because she's actually a lot of fun herself. She's cruisey, easygoing, friendly, really intelligent, and happy to go with the flow. Plus we can constantly laugh together watching Frankie do Frankie.

Marari

We stayed in a beautiful little homestay only a mango's throw from the beach, with a lovely old couple and their extended family.

They made us the most delicious breakfasts, full of traditional South Indian goodies like dark rice flour pancakes with curries and chutneys, and the most amazing thali dinner.

Looking through to the beach from our homestay. We had to walk around the lagoon to get there.

Frankie being artistic for ten minutes

Phil making porn again

Rickying to lunch with a Christian fella

Ajuna being all angelic, which she's not. Well, maybe sometimes.

This didn't work

Drying rice for our dinner

Now this is a beach

The water was nearly hot

Spreadeagled. There were loads of sea eagles about, just like you get in some places in Oz.

It was a beautiful sunset over the Arabian Sea. If you swam out from here and kept going you'd eventually end up on the northeast coast of Africa, in Somalia. Swimming across the Arabian Sea would probably be the safer part of the journey, compared to when you got there. Sadly.

Frankie following his feet up the beach

Having a Break

Well, we weren't the only people on Phil's India itinerary, so after a couple of nights Phil left us, to meet his friend Vijay in Jabalpur.

Next stop for Frankie, Arjuna and I is the Western Ghats, the range of hills separating the states of Kerala and Tamil Nadu.

It'll be cooler, and even greener.

And we might see something incredible in the wild forest, if we're lucky❤️

http://buymeacoffee.com/krolesh9